Being liked is not always the solution

I wrote it. I looked at it. I thought it sounded a little different than I normally sound. I panicked.

I was was out of practice writing completely alone. Normally my copywriter and I collaborate. We have a discussion and we talk through ideas. But I did this by myself and as soon as I sent it to my team for review, I wanted to pull it all back.

What was I doing?

I was creating the application for my upcoming Business Success Retreat (BSR) and I was writing it to serious business owners. I was targeting a very specific group of people and I used really bold wording.

It was easy to write it, but then I instantly felt like putting it out there would make people “not like me.”

Why is Ivy talking like that? I thought she was nice. She’s being really pushy.

I am nice. But I also want people to succeed. When my clients work with me, I am clear and direct, so why was I struggling with being clear and direct in the language I was putting out there?

Being liked is not always not the solution. I know this and see it more and more as my brand and my business expands and grows.

Are you writing messages and content so people like you or so you make an impact?

Are you saying what you want or what you think they want to hear?

Say what you want to say, in a clear and direct voice, be bold, stand in your message and as you are building a bigger and bigger brand, your message needs to be clearer and clearer, stronger and stronger!

Review your website, marketing materials, speaking slides, emails. Review how you are communicating with others, your customers, your employees, your team, your associates. Are you clear, saying what you truly mean, being bold in your communication in all forms?

Are you confident and are you communicating confidently?

If you want to work on this, if you want to learn to stand strong in your message, be yourself and run a business on your terms, I invite you to check out that bold BSR application I wrote right here.

It’s happening June 27-28 in NYC and it’s a two-day, intense meeting full of surprises, breakthroughs, actions and fun. I’d love to save you a seat.

Should I? Shouldn’t I?

gardenI had no idea where to move it.

It was driving me crazy.

This was going to be a huge change.

It took me an hour, but I finally made a decision.

I’m talking about my hydrangea bush! Not what you were expecting. I’m full of surprises.

You know I love gardening and I’m making some changes to the yard and moving that bush was honestly the hardest part for me. It might seem trivial, but where that bush goes determines the rest of my landscape needs and how the entire garden will look.

I wasn’t sure what spot I wanted it in, but I told myself…

“The seasons are changing. The ground is getting cold. Just pick a spot and move it already.”

So, I did.

Decisions have to happen or growth stops.

Business is full of decisions.

Hiring. Firing. Marketing. Budgeting. Networking. Pricing.

The list is endless and if you stay in indecision, you lose. You stunt your growth. You get stuck. And it’s tough to get unstuck.

My advice is simple. Take one action towards the ultimate decision and the next piece will be uncovered or revealed to you. It’s that easy.

For example, you aren’t sure you should sponsor an event in another state next year.

It’s pricey and you’ve never done it before.

Instead of deciding yes or no and that’s it, take an action.

Call or email three people you trust that you know have sponsored that same event in the past and ask them if it provided value. Their answers are going to mean a lot.

Or, look at the timing of the event and the state you’ll be in and determine if you can combine a few components of the trip and visit family or friends in that area or meet up with clients.

Taking one action uncovers the next. You don’t always have to look to the end. Just take it one step at a time. Try it!

If your next decision is reaching out to me, you can do that by emailing support@slatersuccesscoaching.com. And go you! That’s one awesome decision.

10 Tips To Build Your Confidence

At my Business Success Retreat last week, we talked a lot about Confidence. 10 Tips To Build Your Confidence
It’s a word that gets people a little nervous. You might have heard someone say there’s a fine line between confident and cocky. So how do you figure out when you’ve crossed that line?

To me, confidence is about knowing your worth, understanding the value you bring and helping people see why you are the solution to their problem.

Cockiness is more about arrogance, acting as if you are the only person that matters and that people would be wrong not to work with you.

Whether you are a business newbie or a seasoned pro, confidence is one of those traits on which you can always be working.

When I first started doing speaking gigs, I was nervous. Terrified, really. Why would this room of people want to listen to me? Did I really know something they didn’t? Could I offer words to encourage, inspire and motivate? I had to work on my confidence and I came up with 10 tips based on my experience to help you today.

10 Tips To Build Your Confidence 

  1. Think and spread positive thoughts.

This sounds simple, but it’s so important. If you are a positive thinker, you condition yourself to look for the good and the negative tends to float away quickly. The more positive vibes you surround yourself with, the better equipped you are to make an impact when you speak or write.

  1. Practice receiving compliments.

This might sound strange, but it will help. Ask your spouse or kids or friends to pay you a compliment so you learn to react. For some reason, we often feel nervous or guilty if someone tells us we did a good job. Accept the compliment and thank them. It took a lot for them to pay you that compliment and if you practice how to hear it, you won’t feel as awkward when it happens.

  1. Believe in what you are saying.

You are giving a speech or writing a post or holding an event because you have something to say. Believe in it. Not everyone will agree or like it, but your confidence in the belief of your words will help them to listen.

  1. Review your own accomplishments.

Feel like you aren’t “good enough” to hold a talk or an event? Why not? Look at your life and all the things you have accomplished. I bet the list is pretty impressive and worth reflecting on.

  1. Read client testimonials once a month.

I’ve given this advice before. Clients probably write you testimonials all the time. But how often do you really go back and read them? Take in their words and understand the differences you made in their lives.

  1. Know your audience.

Every event is different, so know who you are speaking to. Infuse language that pertains specifically to that audience and connect them with on a deeper level.

  1. Laugh.

Humor should be a part of your everyday. It’s human nature to want to laugh, have fun, giggle. Use humor in your content to loosen up the room and show a welcoming and friendly side.

  1. Know your material.

If you’re giving a speech or a talk, get familiar with your material. Go over your slides, your notecards, your teleprompter text, whatever it may be, until you can recite it in your sleep. The better you know your material, the less you’ll have to look down at notes and you won’t lose your train of thought if technology fails you.

  1. Embrace learning curves.

Get ready for things to go wrong and embrace it. Your slides didn’t transition correctly, your joke bombed, you spilled coffee on your clothes. It’s okay when things don’t go as planned. If you expect the worst, you’ll be ready for anything. There are no mistakes, just learning curves.

  1. Smile, dress the part.

This is easy. Smiling always makes me feel more confident. Try it. And dress the part. If you aren’t someone that enjoys dresses, don’t wear a dress! Wear what fits your style and your confidence will increase tremendously.

I’d love to hear your confidence building tips or tell me which of my tips you plan on trying. Share with me on the  SSC Facebook Page and/or LinkedIn pageIn page. Also, remember Daylight Saving Time this weekend! Spring ahead.

 

Ivy

It’s Only Money, What’s The Big Deal?

I had the honor and privilege to speak at the first iPEC COR.E Retreat this past weekend.

iPEC is the school I went to when I received my Certification as a Professional Coach back in 2008 and this was their first retreat. It was filled with 150 incredible coaches, trainers and leaders from all over the country, as well as a few who flew in from various places abroad.

The topics included: Happiness (I loved that this was a topic); Health; Wealth; as well as activities like yoga; sound healing; and massage. I am sure you can guess the topic I spoke on…Wealth.

It’s so important for coaches, as well as any entrepreneur, to speak openly about the topic of Money or Wealth. I believe it is vitally imperative to realize that Money is not the end all be all of life.

I recently said to someone, “It’s only money, stop obsessing about it.”  Are you scratching your head saying, “What is she talking about? Ivy is always supporting women to grow their businesses and build their lives, and that is all about money.”

I want you to understand that Money is the conduit between where you are and what you are looking for in your life. It is not what you truly want.We want to focus on a goal, something specific.

For the past several years, I have focused on paying for college for my two children. My daughter has graduated and I am halfway through with my son. The end of the line of energy was college, the conduit was the money to pay for it. I am now focusing on my next goal for my life. Money is a provider, we no longer exchange or barter for what we need as we did hundreds of years ago.

We used to exchange meat for bolts of cloth and now we use money as the exchange. Realize that the key takeaway here is that it’s an exchange, not the ultimate goal.

What is your ultimate goal today, what you are working towards? I referred to it in my presentation as your WHY. I like a simple expression, “What do you want? and Why do you want it?”

Please share with me on the SSC Facebook Page what you want and why you want it. I can’t wait to read your answers!

Cheers to your Success.

 

Ivy

Own Your Value: 3 Tips For Success

 If you’ve ever watched shows like Pawn Stars or Hardcore Pawn, you 
understand the idea of value, and how people perceive it so very differently.

Often times, a customer walks into a pawnshop with a sentimental item, something that means a lot to them on a personal level, and they think that will somehow translate into monetary value. They become upset and offended when the storeowners offer them so little for their treasure, because when facts are brought into play, it comes to pass that what they have isn’t really all that valuable.

Determining the worth of an item is pretty much a science when it is a product. There are facts, there are details, ways to compare the item to one exactly like it. A collector may pay a higher fee for an item than what it’s worth, but most likely, everyone agrees upon a set value.

In business, it’s a little harder when determining value, especially your own value, when the product is you. How do you tell someone what you are worth? It’s such an abstract thing when you think about it. Putting a cost on your services, on yourself as a brand. Many entrepreneurs feel very uncomfortable and unprepared asking for what they are worth and they aren’t sure how to proceed with confidence when it comes to this touchy subject.

So how do you do it? Well, let’s revisit the pawnshop analogy. Just like an item is surrounded by facts and details, there are facts and details you can use when figuring out your fees. Here are my three tips:

  1. Leverage Experience
  2. Understand Outcomes
  3. Accept & Seek Advice

At the Business Success Retreat I facilitated this past week, we worked on several key aspects of building a business. It’s consistent that people have trouble with pricing.

But if you use the three ideas above, you will find an effective way to show a client why you are worth what you say you are worth.

Leverage Experience. If you are just staring out in your business, you often see yourself as a beginner and keep your fees low accordingly. This occurred in the BSR last week. Ask yourself, “What am I not new in?” How many years of life experience, various jobs and career changes do you have under your belt? You are at the point where you are trying to build your client base and your business, and those relationships and fundamentals are very important out of the gate. As you gain more experience and, truly, more confidence your rates should increase. Seeing and acknowledging your track record – ten plus years or twenty plus years of experience and knowledge, coupled with client testimonials and success stories is an accurate and proven way to show your worth.

Understand Outcomes. Take yourself out of the equation and look at the results your clients receive from the services that you provide. Are you helping clients add massive revenue to their yearly sales, are you assisting in launches and developments that exponentially grow their business, are you helping with the hiring, training and building of a solid and successful team? Calculate the importance of the transformation, results, and benefits to your client.

Accept & Seek Advice. This is really where you want to start. Don’t try to figure it all out by yourself. Entrepreneurs are often used to doing things alone, but again, it’s not all about you. Find an outside perspective. Talk to people in your industry who have been there. Talk to mentors. Join a networking group. The resources are there and, as a tight-knit community, you will find a friendly entrepreneur or coach ready and willing to offer advice. Allow others to help you see the results your clients receive and create your price structure accordingly.

Have you stepped into your value and asked for what you are worth? Are you ready now? Share with me on the SSC Facebook Page and share your accomplishments and challenges. We would love to hear your stories.

Cheers to your Success.

Ivy

Stepping Into Your Confidence

I was fortunate to speak at a Femfessional event that was hosted at Morgan Stanley. It was a great morning filled with over 40 women.

A lively discussion ensued about women business owners and our difficulty in stepping into our confidence.

Why is it that we often have self doubt? Why do we question our self worth? Does this ring a bell with you?

I know when I moved from my printing business and started out in Slater Success, I questioned my own self worth. I had self doubt. questioned am I good enough and can I make an impact?

Now, that we have opened the discussion, what do we do about it?
I look at building your confidence in the same way we go back to the gym after you have taken an hiatus. You might have been able to do over head presses with a 10 lb. weight and now you have taken a few months off. You go back to the gym and you are struggling so you try a 8 lb. weight. Still a struggle, you go down to a 5 lb. weight and you are good. You start with reps with a set of 8 then next week you do 2 sets of 8.

This is the best way to work your confidence as well. Start by taking small steps that increase your confidence. This might be by reading testimonials you receive from existing clients. Asking clients for feedback from the work you are doing together.

A good question to ask an existing or previous client is, “What has been the biggest impact of our work together?”

We often forget what we have accomplished and how great it was to achieve them. Write down your accomplishments daily and review them.

Share with me on the SSC Facebook Page what you have done to build your own confidence. Let’s bring up the confidence of our entire community.

Cheers to your Success!

Ivy